Hello everybody, it's nice seeing you again.

I just saw the Tom Hanks--Meg Ryan movie "You've Got Mail." This updated classic story is a wonderful romantic comedy that Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan seem to have perfected.

The movie is good. Plain and simple. The way the movie depicts the Internet and resulting interactions is mostly sub-context to the story. I thought that this movie might actually depict a few more details about the Internet and what to expect and what not to expect. However, the movie didn't delve deeply into that subject matter. Which I believe is an error.

Not that it is their responsibility to warn people of the dangers of the Net. Just that the issues of safety and the like were glossed over in an almost commonplace manner. That I thought was the error. They talked of "Cybering" as if it were commonplace and that could lead people to think it is no big deal. It would be at that point I would have to get up on my soap box if for only a moment.

I haven't been on the Internet long. Long enough that I know that Internet relationships are not what they sometimes seem. I'm not saying that real, true and long lasting relationships cannot be built on the Internet. But I know firsthand and from friends that this is not always the case. After all, I got engaged on the Internet. I also got disengaged. I did however, meet my best friend on the Internet. I have also made many other important contacts and friendships over the course of nearly two years on the Internet. (This is how I came to meet the folks at My Mac.) Some are temporary, some I know will last a lifetime. Despite distance.

I guess I was frustrated by the illusion that Tom Hanks or Meg Ryan is waiting for you on the other end of your computer. Tom Hanks isn't always going to be on the other end. Louie the Lounge Lizard might be. And a Charles Mason wannabe is always a distinct possibility. I'm not trying to scare you. It just is as it is.

Here are a few guidelines for the net that I suggest to people who are new to it all.

1. Never give out your real...
Name, Phone, Address, City, or email address. If you want to communicate with someone on the Net, get a web-based email address. Yahoo.com and others will be glad to supply one free of charge (and with some darn nice features I might add.)

2. If you would like to chat, please do so.
But I caution you that your information may be available to others when you least expect it. If in registering for a chat name you're required to include an email address or other information, put in that web-based one (and "imaginatively" fill in the rest). Sometimes there are ways for others to look up information on the individual users in a chat room. Remember, if you type it in, someone will read it.

3. Choose a gender neutral name.
I know we like to be called by our own name. Or a cute nickname that we like. However, it may be a dead giveaway to your gender. Names like Chrissy, Goldilocks, or Dr. Steve generally say too much. Try something that is less specific, like Cookie Monster, BackPacker, or Bicyclist. In other words, something that you like or that describes you, but doesn't give away your gender.

4. Stay away from places that seem rude or vulgar.
If you find a chat room where there are staff members that can boot people that get unruly, bookmark it! If you find a chat room with people of similar interests and tastes, bookmark it! Stay away from chat rooms where you are ignored or are instantly hit up for a "cyberdate"--you have better things to do with your time. (Believe it or not there are chat rooms with staff, and truly nice people. I know, I chat there.)

5. If you do find friends and who knows, maybe even a little romance.
Let it develop over a good long time. A very long time. And if you do ever decide to meet in person? Make absolutely sure you do so in a very public place as well as with a close friend. (Especially if that friend has a cell phone.) I have met way too many people that were sorry for not taking their time.

I'm not saying everyone out there is a stalker, because they aren't. Just ask my best friend. (On second thought, she did kinda stalk me, but that's a whole other story ;-)

Just use some common sense. The one thing missing in all this great new technology is the other person's face, and what your intuition tells you from face to face interactions. So if you do (finally) meet someone from the Internet, don't just assume they must be all right. Your relationship has just begun again. This time you get to know them face to face. And don't just do just special things, do the mundane things too. You know, the store, the video return, monopoly with the kids. All those everyday things. Besides, there is something sacred in the mundane. There really is.

BTW, the movie is GREAT! I highly recommend it! Even if they don't point out some of the things I did here. ;-)

All the best!